I'll always be here for you
by nurseduffin
Summary: A Chuffy story set after Charlie and Duffy share their first kiss in that store cupboard in Series 31 Episode 11 - Thirty Years. The story explores the aftermath of this, and the depth of their feelings for each other and growing relationship.
1. Chapter 1

_"I've always been here for you"_

Chapter One.

"Duffy?" Charlie asked her, as he looked at her for the first time after their kiss ended. Both stood standing together in their embrace.

"I'm sorry". Small tears ran down both cheeks, as she broke into a smile.

"Hey, it's ok, it's going to be ok. I'm here." Charlie replied, hugging her closer to his chest.

"I've waited so very long to be with you, Charlie." She said through gentle sobs, and cracked smiles.

"I've always been here for you Duffy, you know that." Charlie said, as he rubbed her back and shoulders hugging her as much as he could.

Duffy broke free of his grasp to look into his eyes, trying to explain to him just how much he meant to her.

Her palm rested on his face as she spoke, "I know, I didn't realise just how much until I was on the other side of the world, away from you".

She touched her brow to his as she said, "Oh Charlie, I've missed you so much."

"I've missed you too kid." Charlie said, as he moved his head down to kiss her once again.

Their kiss was full of lost time and missed opportunities, both let their emotions surface as their kiss continued further.

It was Charlie who ended their kiss, tears already in his eyes, he needed to see her face as he told her,

"I love you Duffy, I always have."

Duffy's tears fell once more as her emotions overcame her, as she replied,

"I love you too Charlie, I've never stopped loving you."

Their lips met once more as they kissed again, knowing their love for each other had always been there, only this time they could finally embrace it: together.

It was Duffy who broke their kiss. She looked into his eyes, that were full of unshed tears, and so much of that emotion she suddenly felt was part her fault.

"Oh Charlie, I'm so sorry." She raised her hand and touched his cheek.

She looked into his eyes, seeing something she had wanted to see for as long as she'd known him: love.

"For what?" Charlie's reply was full of shock, as he saw her emotions come to life.

"All these years...the years we've lost. It's all my fault." Duffy hesitantly replied. She'd moved her hand onto his chest as she spoke, and began to play with the collar of his scrubs.

Charlie took both her hands in his, as he explained to her. "Duffy, none of this is your fault. I should have told you, done something, much sooner. You weren't to know."

"But, all this time Charlie. And I never knew." Duffy looked up at him, as he tried to reassure her.

"I didn't want to hurt you, to hurt us. I didn't want to just be that bloke to split up your family. You're worth more to me than that."

"Charlie, you have no idea do you?"

"About what?"

"Do you really think I never felt the same about you?"

"But Duffy, you and Ryan?"

"Long before Ryan, Charlie."

"Before Andrew?"

"I married Andrew, and Ryan for all the wrong reasons, I know that now. But at the time, well, I was blind-sided wasn't I?" She replied, looking rather pensive.

"Charlie, you have been my oldest and closest friend, but I kept close to you because I loved you. I'd rather be your friend, your best friend, than lose you if I told you how I felt about you."

"I never knew."

"Well then, now you know, and now we've wasted years and years apart. And it's all my fault." She frustratingly said, as tears trickled down her cheeks.

"Oh Duffy, we're both to blame. But just for putting our friendship first. Why do you think it took me so long to tell you? Because I couldn't bare to lose you as a friend." Charlie held her hands as he spoke honestly to her.

"Oh Charlie, we've made a right mess of things haven't we?" She choked back her fresh new tears, as she looked down at their hands.

"Well isn't it about time we changed all that?" He said, as he took her into his arms and kissed her tentatively at first, releasing her to gauge her reaction.

"I think we..." Charlie was about to speak when the keypad on the door was being pressed, and the handle on the door turned, as someone was trying to get into the store room.

Both were surprised by the interruption and they quickly separated from their embrace, to find Elle trying to get into the room.

"Duffy? Charlie? Peter has been looking for you." Elle said, looking at a teary Duffy, and shocked Charlie.

"Tell him I'll be right there." Duffy quite reassuringly replied to Elle.

"Duffy, are you alright?" Elle's concern for her colleague was apparent.

"I'm fine, Charlie was just trying to cheer me up." Duffy suppressed a smile through her tears she tried to hide.

Charlie smiled back at Elle, as he replied, whilst he put his hands in his trouser pockets.

"She's had a bit of an upsetting day."

"Of course, I'll let Peter know you're ok." Elle replied.

"Thanks." Duffy replied to Elle, as she looked at them both and swiftly left the room.

"I think we better go, Peter sounds worried." Charlie says, as he steps closer to Duffy.

"Yes, yes, you're right." Duffy replies, as she turns to the table top and picks up the photograph of the two of them together.

"I struggled you know, without you. This was the only reminder I had of you that kept me going, kept me strong. And I always kept it close." Duffy gestured to the crinkled, slightly aging photograph.

"I know, Peter told me." Charlie said, as he looked down at the photograph in her hands.

"Peter told you?" Duffy said shocked by his response.

"I think your boy knows you a lot more than you think."

"Ha, yeah, ha, I think he does." Duffy smiled at the photograph in her hands, and back at Charlie.

Charlie opened the door as she walked out of the room, as he followed on closely behind.

-x-


	2. Chapter 2

_"I miss us, and those years."_

Chapter Two.

Duffy walked into the maternity room to a waiting Peter and Tanya. Peter was holding Tanya's hand as he peered into the incubator where his daughter lay sleeping. He looked up to see his Mum, and Charlie enter the room. He noticed both seemed calmer, and relaxed, but also saw they were hiding something far deeper than they were willing to admit.

"Mum, are you ok?" Peter asked, as he had seen the redness in his Mum's eyes, the result of spent tears.

Duffy walked over towards Peter and put a reassuring hand on his arm.

"Oh, yes love, I'm fine. How's this precious little girl doing?" Duffy asked, as she peered into the incubator to see her granddaughter sleeping peacefully, she smiled down at her.

"The nurse said she was doing fine, and to expect tiredness from the trauma of her birth." Tanya responded, looking up at Duffy, who was seated next to the incubator.

"Yes, she'll be quite exhausted from all that, but she will be monitored for the next few days, in case there are any underlying problems. I'll have a word with her nurse. She'll be fine Tanya, she's a beautiful little girl. We're so proud of you. Both of you." Duffy replied.

She looked sincerely at her daughter-in-law, already knowing the procedure and words to use in this situation. Little did she know how those words felt when it was her own granddaughter she was talking about.

"And you Mum, we're so grateful of you, and Charlie. I'd have lost them both without you two." Peter turned to Charlie, who was standing at in the doorway, with his hands in his pockets looking on at Duffy and the young family.

Charlie nodded to Peter, then smiled.

"I meant it Mum, without you two, I don't know what would have happened." Peter's strong willpower began to fade as his emotions began to surface.

"Oh Peter, it's alright, everything is going to be alright." Duffy, already at Peter's side, turned to him and hugged him close to her, patting his back in comfort.

"And you Mum, are you going to be alright?" Peter loosened his grip on his Mum, as he spoke, looking directly at her.

She turned to look at Charlie, then back at her son.

"For the first time in a long time Peter, I think I am. Thanks to you." She hugged her son closer to her as she realised her son had known all along. All she needed was a little help along the way.

All Charlie could do was stand and look at the family that appeared before him, never knowing that one day this family could one day let him be part of theirs.

Duffy turned to Charlie, and held out her hand gesturing for him to take it. Peter released his hold of his Mum, and within a few strides Charlie was by her side. Charlie looked at the woman before him, the woman he'd known for over thirty years, someone who had always been more than just a friend, someone he loved for more years than he could say. And now, he was standing holding her hand in his, as she smiled then drew him into an embrace. They stood there in each others arms, as their eyes closed in realisation that this is where they belonged: together.

Peter could see just how much his Mum needed his uncle far more than she would ever admit to herself. He'd seen his Mum at her weakest and most vulnerable quite a few times that day, but to suddenly regain her strength and be calmed so easily by simply being in his presence or hearing his words of reassurance. Well, this only fuelled his idea of where his Mum's heart truly lay. Now, seeing them standing together each supporting the other, it was even more evident that they both needed the other. His Step-Father Ryan, well, who was he to say that he really loved his Mum too, they hadn't had a bad life growing up with him. But, he always noticed one important thing about Ryan, he wasn't the man his Mum needed. His Mum always hid away at her lowest, preferred to have time on her own, than to seek comfort from anyone.

It was one day a year or so after they'd moved had he seen his Mum crying in their basement, attempting to shield her sobs with the sounds of the dryer tumbling its load, and her mind fixed on something, but not the dirty laundry sat in front of her. He was sure she hadn't heard him come down the steps, and even more sure that she hadn't seen him sit on the steps hiding from view. He'd seen the photograph in her hands, and saw her stroke the man in the picture but hadn't been able to make out who it was. At first he thought it was his Dad, Andrew, which was completely natural for her to still miss him. It wasn't odd to think his Mum was upset because of him, not at all. He wanted to go to her, to hug her and tell her it was ok to miss him, just as he did too. But, just as he was about to move did he hear her speak.

"Oh Charlie, I miss you so much." She said, as she clutched the photograph to her chest as tears fell down her cheeks.

Realisation struck Peter, as it hit him, thoughts whirling around in his head. Charlie? Uncle Charlie? Mum, Mum missed Uncle Charlie? He then delicately rose from his seated position on the steps, and nonchalantly banged his feet heavily on the steps to make sure his presence was known to his Mum.

"Mum? Mum? Are you ok?" Peter walked towards his Mum, frowning as he spoke.

"Oh Peter...I'm fine love...just doing the laundry." Duffy tried to conceal the shock in her voice, as she had hurriedly put the photograph into her back pocket.

"But you've been crying" Peter said, concern written all over his face.

"Oh, that's just allergies, ha, that washing conditioner has a strong smell." Duffy said, picking up the large bottle in her hands for emphasis.

"But Mum?" Peter's responded, trying to question his Mum further.

"What do you want for your tea love? I'll not be much longer down here." Duffy said, and she smiled back at him.

"Go and have a look and I'll be with you in a bit. Go on Peter, I won't be long."

"But Mum?"

"Peter, please, do as you're told."

"Alright, alright." Peter replied, as he frowned again at his Mum, he patience running thin as his saw his Mum was getting annoyed at him now.

Uncle Charlie? Mum, misses Uncle Charlie?

That first memory of finding out his Mum had feelings for his uncle was only the start of it. As the years rolled by, the more his Mum hid herself away, grabbing her bag as she disappeared off into a room. And coming back out like the she had the world on her shoulders. And he tried desperately to help her. He suggested they spend more time together, or gave her opportunities to make new friends, introducing his mum to his friends mum's. Trying to get her some support was better than seeing her without any. But, it was useless sometimes, when she was sad, low, or upset she disappeared, off she went with her bag, and that photograph for support. He thought about writing to his uncle, but then how could he? What would he say?

And then Mum left Ryan, and Mike came along. About time too, as he was worrying how she would be when he left for Uni. It didn't matter for long, as Mum helped me get into Singapore University, and off we all went too. Leaving Ryan behind, and our home in New Zealand. But it was Mum who needed to leave, she wasn't happy, and Mike, well seemed to make her happy.

It wasn't long before I'd had a phone call from Mum announcing her and Mike were opening their own clinic in Cambodia. She was so excited, and couldn't wait until it opened. I asked if she could manage it all, and said it was fine, "I've got the Calvary coming to help. Uncle Charlie is coming in a few days".

"Uncle Charlie is coming?"

"Yeah, I can't wait for him to see this place. He may even love it as much as we do, maybe he'll stay and help us?"

"Oh, that would be great Mum."

I could hear the excitement in her voice and it made me smile. But I also found it hard to distinguish her excitement for the clinic opening, or seeing Uncle Charlie. It was only a few weeks later did I hear the sadness back again in Mum's voice, when she called. Mike had a stroke and they were coming to stay in Singapore. The clinic would run without them. But there was little mention of Uncle Charlie, as he'd been and gone. And her sadness overcame her in her voice: her dream had disappeared, Mike was too sick, and Charlie, well, she hardly spoke of him. Mum was unhappy again, and it killed me.

A few months later, Mike had been successfully given a place in a reputable home for the infirm. Mum had said her goodbyes, more so his wishes than hers. And was alone, once again. But it was Paul who persuaded her to return to New Zealand, he missed his friends, etc. And Mum, well, I think she was a bit lost. It wasn't long until Ryan and her reconciled their differences, after 18 months apart. And it was great for Jake, and Paul too. But Mum needed something to focus on, she'd returned to her old job as Sister at Auckland General as soon as she could when they moved back. But, restless as she was she needed a challenge, so decided to complete her Midwifery Certificate. It took her a few days a week, part-time, for a few years but she did it. Fully qualified Midwife, and Nurse. The new job gave her a fresher outlook on life, as she put it. "There's no greater sound than of a baby's heartbeat". But when I visited her and Ryan, with Tanya, for our engagement she still had that sadness in her. Like a part of her was missing and she didn't know how to find it again. Soon after Tanya and I were married. Jake had moved out following his announcement he had a new job in Sydney and would be back at Christmas. Then there was Paul, already spending far too much time with his friends than being at home. And Ryan, well, he was away with work a lot, and barely saw Mum. So when we had some time alone, on Christmas Day, I asked her, and her reply had been a bit of a shock.

"I miss home Peter."

"What do you mean Mum? You are home"

"Oh I don't know, not here, I live here Peter but it doesn't feel like where I need to be sometimes. I miss England. I miss my home."

I could see the tears in her eyes.

"Then go", I said, far too abruptly I thought at the time.

"What?" She looked puzzled.

"Look Mum, if you need some time on your own, then go, go home."

"You really think I should?"

"Why not."

"But Paul, Ryan, the house..."

"Mum, they can manage without you. Go and have some time to yourself, you need it."

"Thank you Peter." She hugged me, a lot tighter than she had done in a long time.

As I drank the last of my lager, I stood up and looked at the vast array of Christmas cards that filled the mantelpiece of the fireplace. Each card I picked up signed by various new parents at the hospital all thanking my Mum for her help. Some were from her colleagues at work too. Then I found the card that meant more to my Mum than all the rest. From Uncle Charlie, two lines of words that clearly showed how much he missed her.

Duffy,

Merry Christmas, and have a happy new year!

So many Christmases and years go by, and I still think of you, of us. I miss us, and those years.

Your friend

Charlie x

Now I knew why Mum wanted to go home so much. Because of Uncle Charlie.

Seeing them together, even if their hug hadn't lasted more than a minute or so, it was obvious that they had finally resolved what they needed to. It was the way they stood looking at each other. Uncle Charlie squeezed Mum's hands, and it was his gaze and smile that showed me what I needed to see for myself. He simply adored Mum.

"So Peter, Tanya, have you decided on a name for my granddaughter?" Duffy asked, trying to break the tension in the room, as all eyes seemed to be on her and Charlie.

Peter looked towards Tanya, then to Charlie and Duffy, then replied, "Katherine".

"Oh, Peter, Katherine, after your Gran? That's beautiful." Duffy said, taken aback by her son.

"We thought so too, she'd of loved it." Peter smiled, looking at his Mum, and then back down to look at his sleeping daughter.

"Yes, yes she would've." Duffy's eyes slowly began to fill up, but Charlie had noticed her reaction and quickly grasped her hand and gently squeezed it.

She turned to him, and Charlie thoughtfully smiled back at her.

Charie remembered exactly when her Mum, Kate, was rushed into the E.D., but sadly died a short time after. Kate had known that Duffy would never let her go herself, so discussed with Charlie that if the time came, to not resuscitate her. Duffy had tried to resuscitate Kate herself, but Charlie explained it was her wish not to. It was after her death that Duffy found his support difficult, as she felt he was in part to blame for her early death. Something he found very difficult to deal with, as it was Ryan who she ended up receiving support from, if only by coincidence. But, that was a long time ago. Fate had other ideas. Now it was his hand holding hers, where it should be.

"Ah, Mr and Mrs Duffin. We've had Katherine's bloods back and some other tests all are thankfully clear. Although she has a slight issue with her oxygen levels, which is understandable following her traumatic birth. So we should see an improvement in her in the next few hours or so. So we'll keep her under observation for now. Thanks to your Mum and Charlie here, and their quick response, you were both very lucky. Or it could have been much worse. So Mrs. Duffin we'll keep you here with Katherine until you feel strong enough to support yourself and cope with your stitches. She's a gorgeous little girl, you're very lucky. I'll speak with you soon." The middle-aged midwife advised, speaking to the young couple.

"Thank you." Tanya replied.

"Yes, thank you." Peter smiled in his response.

"My pleasure." She smiled at the young couple.

"Oh, Sandra can I have a word outside, please?" Duffy asked her, she had worked with the midwife for a few weeks so knew her well enough so she would be able to speak on level terms with her about her Granddaughter.

"No problem." Sandra, smiled and nodded her reply.

"I won't be long." Duffy smiled at Charlie, Peter, and Tanya.

Charlie released her hand, and watched her leave the room. Charlie turned to Peter and smiled, thinking of some words of wisdom he could share, but also felt slightly apprehensive. Especially as they had barely spoken since they'd arrived. It was a few moments of awkward silence until Charlie spoke.

"Your brother, Paul, pulled through alright remember. She's in the best hands. I wouldn't worry too much." Charlie smiled, as he noticed Paul's face relax at his words.

"Thanks Uncle Charlie." Peter smiled back at his uncle, as he then looked down at his daughter.

"No problem." Charlie smiled politely.

Peter then looked up, and said.

"For everything...especially for being there for Mum." Peter sighed halfway through, unsure how to discuss it with his uncle.

Charlie just smiled, and blushed slightly.

A few more moments later Duffy walked back into the room.

"Well then, all we need to do now is let Tanya and Katherine get some rest. Peter, do you want to go home and get some of Tanya, and Katherine's things? I'll take you home if you want, and you can come back later?" Duffy walked back into the very quiet room, with a very happy smile on her face.

"Oh? Yes, erm, of course. If that's ok?" Peter looked towards Tanya, noticing that she did seem extremely exhausted.

Tanya smiled wearily, and nodded in agreement, "If you don't mind, but I would like a rest."

"Ok, I'll be back in a few hours alright." Peter stepped towards his wife, kissed her on the forehead, squeezed her hand and walked towards his Mum nearest the door.

Duffy grinned at her daughter-in-law, walked over to her and hugged her tight as she spoke. "Take care Tanya, Sandra will be popping in to check on Katherine every half an hour, but she knows not to disturb you. You must get some rest alright." Duffy kissed her on the cheek.

Duffy turned to leave the room, as Peter, and Charlie followed on after her.

"I'll meet you at the car Peter, I'll be five minutes." Duffy said, as they walked towards the exit of the maternity ward. She'd handed Peter her car keys and smiled at her son reassuringly.

Peter walked out through the double doors leaving the building, and his Mum alone with Charlie.

Duffy turned to Charlie, who had walked this far with them.

"I can't promise I'll be free for dinner or anything Charlie, but, I'd still like it if I could see you, later tonight?" Duffy asked, somewhat flustered, and a touch of red blushing at her cheeks.

"Oh, of course, if you're sure? I don't mind if you're going to be busy, especially with Peter, Tanya and baby Katherine?" Charlie replied, quite shocked that she'd even contemplate sharing her evening with him, especially after today.

"I think, I'd prefer it, after today. I could do with some, company." Duffy looked at him, a little touch of relief on her face after hearing his response.

"No problem, no problem at all." Charlie replied, taking her hands in his and squeezing them for emphasis.

He looked directly into her eyes, and smiled back at her. Feeling her body ease at he gripped her hands. She sighed, returning her own smile to his. He let her hands go. As she walked out of the double doors leaving the building, Charlie sighed to himself watching her go.

-x-


	3. Chapter 3

_"I need you..."_

Chapter Three.

By 9:30pm he'd given up hope that she'd be stopping by tonight. He'd already had three whiskeys and felt like he may need a fourth, as the day's events had been circling around in his mind all evening. He sat at the kitchen breakfast bench eagerly looking at the label, "Chardonnay, a sweet flavoursome fruity white wine, with a hint of elderflower and citrus flavours", on the bottle of wine in his hands. Then he placed the bottle back down on the kitchen counter top.

He knew she'd like it. But doubted she'd be here this evening to enjoy it. He sighed to himself. It was selfish of him to expect her to show up, she's had a very upsetting day, who was he to say that she had be here anyway. He picked up his bottle of Jameson whiskey and poured himself his fourth glass. Then the doorbell rang. He froze on the spot, glass raised at his lips, and gulped his mouthful of whiskey down in surprise.

"Christ!" Charlie exclaimed to himself.

He looked down at the whiskey in his hand, and gulped the last of it's contents, for courage he thought.

Duffy was nervously waiting for him to answer the door. Although it wasn't long before he was there standing in the doorway welcoming her into his home.

They smiled at each other, blushing in turn as she walked into the hallway. Ever the gentleman Charlie offered to take her coat, politely she handed it to him. After the events from today, and their heated kiss, this evening he wasn't expecting anything from her. But to now finally have her here in his home. He didn't think he would be able to avoid kissing her again.

Charlie managed to speak but his nerves got the better of him as he stumbled on a few words at her, "Erm, have you eaten at all? Would you...would you, like some tea or orange juice?"

"I've eaten thanks, I hope you have too Charlie, I'm sorry it's so late. But I wanted to come." Duffy looked at him, reading all to well the nerves written all over his face.

"Oh, it's fine. Not trouble at all. I've had a bite to eat too thanks. What would you like to drink?" Charlie asked her as he followed her down the hallway into the kitchen.

As Duffy walked into the kitchen she noticed the bottle of whiskey on the counter top, and the empty glass alongside a bottle of white wine.

"A glass of wine would be lovely." She said, as she smiled back at Charlie as he entered the room.

"One glass of wine coming up." He smiled back at her, with a bit more enthusiasm in his voice.

"How's Tanya and Katherine?" He asked, as he reached into the cupboard for a wine glass.

"Oh Katherine's oxygen levels reached normal levels about an hour or so after we left. Her obs have been improving ever since. Just a response after the birth thankfully. Tanya is naturally quite tired, and achy, but other than that she is on the mend. It's such a relief." Duffy said, as she was handed a glass of wine from Charlie.

She took a sip and smiled appreciatively at him and said, "Mmm, beautiful wine Charlie, good choice."

"I knew you'd like it. I'm so pleased they're both doing well." Charlie smiled back at her, listening and watching her as she spoke.

He knew that she felt a little more comfortable, as her words came tumbling out of her.

He then poured himself another whiskey and took a sip.

"I'm just so relieved they're both ok, it was a very complicated birth." Duffy said, troubled by the memory of today, as she looked up at Charlie, catching his eye.

"You were fantastic with them both Duffy. You should believe in yourself more. You're a great midwife, and nurse." Charlie replied, reassuring her.

"I lost my nerve Charlie, completely. I'd never have delivered Katherine, and I doubt she'd of survived if you hadn't been there." Duffy's nerve suddenly broke in front of him, as tears formed in her eyes, as the guilt suddenly hit her.

"Oh Duffy." Charlie said, as he walked over to her, took her glass from her hand and hugged her close.

"It's alright." Charlie said, as she began to cry into his shoulder.

"It's not alright though Charlie. I could have lost my granddaughter today." She said, through gentle sobs.

"But you didn't, and you haven't. It's all over with now, she's fine." Charlie said, as he rubbed her back trying to comfort her.

"I'd never have delivered her without you there."

"It was a team effort Duffy, I only followed your lead. They are your family, and family always cloud our judgement you know that. You delivered her though, and together we brought her back."

"Together?" Duffy said, as she raised her head from his shoulder, sniffing and brushing back some of her tears.

"Yes, that's right Duffy. Together."

"Oh Charlie. You're the only one who knows how to calm me. Do you know that?"

"I've had a lot of practise." Charlie said, as he winked at her, then broke into a grin.

She laughed at him.

Then they both realised what that really meant. They knew each other inside and out. They'd known each other for over thirty years, but only as friends. But they knew now that it was always more than just friendship. They were good for each other, good together, much better than apart. Were they soulmates? Standing in front of each other, holding each other close. Their feelings for each other reflecting in their eyes, they slowly realised that they well could be soulmates. So there was only one thing left for them to do: be together.

It was Duffy who leaned in to kiss him, then pulled away slightly, nervously looking into his eyes. Then Charlie kissed her, tentatively at first, then he drew her body into his as their kiss deepened further. A few moments later their kiss ended.

Duffy spoke first, hurriedly as if her mind spoke for her.

"I need you." She breathed.

"I need you too." Charlie replied, as he kissed her again.

As their kiss ended, Duffy rested her head against his. They stood for a few moments taking in only the sound of their own breathing.

"Charlie..." Duffy looked up at him, staring into his eyes, as she paused, somewhat shakily.

"It's alright Duffy. It's ok. Why don't we go and sit down. Have a drink to calm your nerves. Hmm?" Charlie said, as he took her hands in his.

She nodded in response, as he squeezed her hands, smiled back at her, then let her go.

Charlie picked up her bottle of wine, and his bottle of whiskey. As Duffy picked up his whiskey glass, and her wine glass. They walked down the hallway into the living room.

Duffy she sat down on one side of his sofa, after she'd placed both glasses on the coffee table in front of her. He too then placed her wine bottle and his whiskey bottle on the coffee table. They both poured themselves a glass of alcohol. As Charlie sat at the opposite end of the sofa from her.

Duffy gulped at her wine, and sighed as she began to speak. "The truth is Charlie I've never felt so useless as I did today, not only as a midwife but as a mother."

"It's perfectly normal to feel like that Duffy, but try not to beat yourself up about it." Charlie said, taking a sip of his whiskey.

"I can't stop thinking about it." Duffy replied, as she looked down at her wine and took another gulp, somewhat shakily as the wine soothed her nerves.

"You did what you had to do, and everything's turned out alright hasn't it?" Charlie turned to her as he spoke.

"I suppose." Duffy replied, still looking down at her glass, she took another sip.

"Tanya and Katherine are fine, you said so yourself." Charlie responded, looking puzzled.

"Yes, yes, they are. They're fine." Duffy said, again not raising her head to look at him.

"There's something else isn't there?" Charlie asked, his brow now creased.

"Have Peter and Tanya changed their minds about staying in England? Is that's what's upsetting you too?" Charlie asked her, suddenly realising this could be another underlying problem for her.

"No, no, they've decided to stay. As long as, erm.. as long as I stay too." Duffy answered, slightly stumbling on her last few words, as she looked at him for his reaction.

Charlie's face fell, he didn't know if that was her way of saying she wasn't sure, or if she was trying to say she had already made up her mind. He swallowed hard and then took a large gulp of his whiskey, hoping it will calm his nerves if her answer hurt him.

"And do you...do you want to stay?" Charlie's almost choked on his words, due to his fear of her response. He sighed, looking at her, the pain already marking his face.

"Oh Charlie..." Duffy's voice broke, as she turned to finally look at him. She saw the fear in his face, as she realised that he might have thought she was there to tell him she was leaving.

"I only came back, for you." Duffy replied sorrowfully, as she reached up and cupped his face with the palm of her hand. She smiled at him, tears starting to form in her eyes.

His reaction to her words hit him hard, as his eyes had already began to tear up. He let out a sign of relief. Then the alcohol suddenly gave his mind a voice, and the courage to speak, to finally tell her honestly how he felt. He quietly responded with, "Duffy, I...I don't think I could bare to see you leave again." His eyes emphasised his deepest feelings for her.

"Oh Charlie, I'm so sorry." Duffy replied, as the shock overcame her, taken aback by his admission.

Duffy dropped her hand from his face, as she quickly placed her glass on the table. She then turned fully towards Charlie, gripping his hand in hers.

"Duffy, I don't know what to else say..." Charlie's response was no more than a whisper, his eyes full of unshed tears.

Duffy replied, "you don't have to say anything...", sighing at his words, she squeezed his hand for emphasis.

Charlie sighed, then smiled wistfully looking at her. A tear escaped from his eye as it began to fall down his cheek. He then whispered the words, "I love you,".

Duffy moved closer to him, brushing away his tear. Tears filled her own eyes, as she replied, "I love you too", looking directly at him.

She cupped his face, as she moved closer and kissed him. As they broke their kiss, Charlie couldn't help it, as another tear fell down his face. He smiled back at her, as he let out a sigh of relief. Duffy smiled back at him and her eyes too had unspent tears in them.

She looked down, and held his hands, that were cupping his glass on his knee.

"I'm sorry, for putting you through so much pain." Duffy said, as she raised her hand to brush away his tear.

"It's in the past." Charlie sorrowfully replied, trying to shrug it off.

"And it hurt you, and I'm so sorry for that." Duffy replied, as her palm rested on his hands.

Charlie sighed, and looked down at his glass. He raised his glass to his lips and drank a large gulp. He sighed again heavily, then began to speak.

"I tried to tell you that day...I lost my nerve...then it was too late." Charlie replied, the memory filled his mind, as he told her how he truly felt on that day.

"I'm sorry..." Duffy, her reply was of shock, but he interrupted her.

"You left...and all I could do was watch you drive away with Ryan." Charlie said,

"I'm so sorry, so very sorry." Duffy replied, trying to reach out to him.

But Charlie got up from the sofa, taking another gulp of his whiskey as he needed to speak, but didn't think he could tell it all to her face. He reached down for his whiskey and poured more into his glass.

"Charlie?" Duffy asked, looking at him with confusion written all over her face.

"Please Duffy, you need to hear this." Charlie cut her off before she could speak further. He was now standing at his fireplace opposite her, the whiskey bottle standing on the mantelpiece, now half empty.

"After everything that happened with Baz over the years. I didn't think love was ever going to find me. But you were always there for me. And I didn't realise how much you meant to me until someone else had you. I promised myself that when the right time came, I would tell you how I felt. After you left, and when Baz died I can't say I was hopeful of ever loving again. But when I first heard about Ryan, I can't say I was surprised. But then along came Mike. I just couldn't stand by and see you get hurt again. But seeing you two together. I knew I had to let you go. I had to move on." Charlie said, suddenly his words spilled out of him, between sips of his whiskey. He thought maybe because he was drunk, or because he couldn't see her face. But he felt for the first time he could tell her: everything.

"Then Maggie came along. But things didn't work out well between us, she didn't want the same things as me, and she left. And I was alone, once again. But then you came back. Ha, when I first saw you again, admittedly I thought you were a hallucination. But it felt like I was being given a second chance. And now, I don't think I could, what I'm trying to say Duffy. Is I don't think could cope if you left me; not like this, not now, not ever." Charlie said, as through gulps of his whiskey, until his glass was empty once again. He looked down at the glass in his hands, not able to look at her.

"Oh Charlie." Duffy said, as tears ran down both her cheeks. She raised herself from the sofa, placed her glass on the table, and stood in front of him. She held his hands, as they grasped the whiskey glass.

She tried to catch his eyes, but they were fixed looking on his glass. She rose her hand to his cheek and quietly spoke, as her emotions were overcoming her, "I promise I won't leave ever leave you, again." She smiled wistfully at him, as she saw the pain in his face.

His eyebrows raised as tears dropped down his face, he sighed, and smiled as she brushed them off with her thumb.

She leaned in and kissed him. She could taste the whiskey, and he felt unsteady on his feet, as she tried to support him, her arms around his back, their kiss deepened. He draped his arm around her shoulder, then rose his hand into her hair, as his passion for her increased. A few moments later it was he who broke their kiss first, as he said, "I'm sorry...I'm drunk, I don't want you to think that..."

"Charlie, it's alright." Duffy said, as she smiled back at him, then kissed him once again.

Charlie broke their kiss, turned to put the whiskey glass on the mantelpiece at the side of them, then looked steadily at Duffy. His eyes revealing his intense feelings for her.

"Are you sure?" Charlie whispered.

"I've never been more sure of anything." Duffy replied, taking her hand in his.

Charlie smiled back as her as they walked out of the living room, upstairs.

She hadn't expected to have such an eventful day as yesterday. Meeting her granddaughter for the first time was always going to be a momentous occasion. But to deliver her herself, then find out she wasn't breathing. That was the one of hardest things she had ever had to deal with. If it wasn't for Charlie keeping her focused, she doubt her granddaughter would have survived at all. But he kept her strong, and kept her from crumbling into pieces. Mr Charlie Fairhead, her friend, best friend. And now? Now he lay at her side, in his bed.

The emotions of yesterday, her son's outspokenness, and admissions from them both had finally brought them together. After thirty years. Thirty years, that's how long they'd known each other. They'd been nothing more than good friends. She smiled to herself recalling the brash, curly haired Charlie, with his soft puppy dog eyes. Ha, she won't admit it was instant attraction, but she had always had a soft spot for him, something that grew the more she got to know the real him. And because of their friendship it became increasingly hard to actually make a move and declare her feelings to him. So, she resisted. All those years of friendship. She knew it was more than that, and he finally admitted that to her yesterday.

It's funny thinking about it all now. But even if Peter hadn't mentioned anything would she still be lying here sharing Charlie's bed? When Charlie asked her that morning if she was free to come to his for dinner and wine that night, she accepted instantly. But she couldn't help but feel like they were like a pair of teenagers so nervous and embarrassed. But inside she was doing cartwheels. Charlie boy had finally done it, he'd asked her out. And she couldn't have felt more happier if she'd tried. And now, well, now, she was sharing his bed.

Charlie moved slightly, as he felt fingers running softly against his cheek.

"Charlie, Charlie?" Duffy spoke softly against his ear.

"Mmmm?" Charlie groaned, and then slowly opened his eyes.

"Morning." Duffy said, her hand rested on his chest, as she propped herself up on her elbow, looking intently at him.

"Good morning." Charlie replied, a smile spread across his lips.

Charlie looked up at her, her hair draped slightly across her face, he raised his hand and tucked her hair behind her ear.

"You're so beautiful." Charlie remarked, grinning at her.

"Oh Charlie." Duffy responded, blushing.

"Absolutely gorgeous."

"Stop it."

"Why? You are."

"I'm nearly sixty."

"Well then, you're a stunningly beautiful, gorgeous, almost sixty year old." He said, winking at her, as he smirked slightly.

"Ha, ha, oh Charlie." She patted him on his chest.

"Just don't make a habit of mentioning my age will you? Inside I'm eighteen, honestly." He remarked, smiling at her.

"Ha, ha, oh really?" Duffy replied, giggling at him.

"I don't mind showing you?" Charlie said, he winked back at her, as he put his arm around her waist.

"Is that so, Charlie boy?" Duffy said, as she leaned in to kiss him.

-x-


	4. Chapter 4

_"Shame...that's what it was"_

Chapter Four.

Charlie stood at the oven flipping over the second pancake he'd made. Whilst Duffy sat at the kitchen breakfast bench drinking her cup of coffee.

"I feel thoroughly spoilt." Duffy remarked.

"Hmm?" Charlie said, as he rested _the_ frying pan on the hob.

"Toast, pancakes, freshly brewed coffee, orange juice." Duffy replied.

"There's even some cereal, if you're feeling extra hungry." Charlie said, winking at her.

"Oh, no, no, they're all perfect. Thank you." Duffy said, after she took another bite of her pancake.

"No, trouble. You're worth spoiling." Charlie replied, smiling back at her, as he rested his elbows on the breakfast counter in front of her.

"Oh Charlie." Duffy replied, as she smiled back at him.

After their breakfast Charlie suggested they go for lunch at a lovely little pub just outside Wyvern, along the coast. Duffy was due to visit Tanya and Katherine later that day, so she had a few hours spare so readily accepted.

Charlie dropped Duffy at home first so she could change, and waited in her little open plan living room, part kitchen. It wasn't a large flat, two bedrooms, kitchen-diner but it was enough for Duffy. Thoroughly modern at the other side of town, not too far from the hospital, ideal really.

"It's a nice place Duffy." Charlie said, as he was shown around her flat.

"It's not a palace, but it's home, I won't be long." Duffy replied, as she disappeared into one of the bedrooms to change.

Charlie smiled back at her, then decided to make himself comfortable and sat on her sofa. As he had done so his eyes caught the collection of photographs that were scattered lovingly around the television unit. As his interest got the better of him, so he got up to take a closer look. The first photograph he saw was of Peter and Tanya's wedding two years ago. The two of them looked so happy together, it made him feel very proud, as he'd known Peter since he was born. Out of all the boys Peter looked most like his father Andrew. It also reminded him how Peter was no longer the young boy he remembered, he was a man, a husband and now a father. That thought made him smile, but also made him think about what Peter had told him previously. Duffy had a family, and now a grandchild, and now he was the main reason why that family was so broken. That thought unsettled him slightly.

He then looked over at the photograph of Jake, he was standing on the top of a snow top covered mountain. He too had grown from a small boy into a man. He remembered how much Jake as a young boy was obsessed with playing adventure games, so it was no surprise to him that as a man he'd wanted to travel the world. Then there was Paul, the youngest, the baby he'd help deliver in Duffy's own living room. What a day that had been. Charlie then remembered the young boy being wheeled out of his house in his pushchair on the last day Duffy had stayed at his house. The day she left with Ryan. He found it hard now to picture Paul now as a young man. All those years gone. He'd missed out on so much of Duffy's life, he had also missed out on seeing her three boys grow from boys to men.

He sighed to himself, as the thought of all those lost years saddened him. As he looked around he saw, to his surprise, there were no photographs of Duffy, and more importantly none of Ryan. Had she really walked away from her marriage, her two other sons, and returned to England, and Holby just for him?

Just as the thought was rolling around in his mind the doorbell rang loudly, which made Charlie jump slightly in surprise.

Charlie had no idea whether he should leave it, or answer it? After the fourth ring the caller sounded impatient.

Duffy shouted out of the bedroom door to him.

"Charlie can you get that for me please?"

"Oh, ok, no problem." Charlie replied.

He walked over to the door, and opened it to find Peter standing there.

"Uncle Charlie?" Peter said, astonished.

"Peter, looking for your Mum?" Charlie replied, a hint of red beginning to appear in his cheeks.

"Yeah, where is she?" Peter asked, as he walked into the flat, and into the sitting room.

"Just, erm, she won't be too long." Charlie reassured him.

"Is Katherine ok?" Charlie quickly asked, concern written on his face.

"Yeah, yeah, she's fine." Peter asked, slightly puzzled at why his uncle was in his mum's sitting room at 10:00am on a Sunday morning.

"And Tanya?" Charlie asked, sounding sincere.

"Yeah, she's doing fine too." Peter replied, as he took a seat on his mum's sofa. He felt out of place, and unsettled. He scanned the room trying to find anything to suggest if his uncle had 'stayed the night', but there was nothing to suggest he had. Then he noticed Charlie was wearing his coat. Perhaps he hadn't stayed the night, then it hit him she must of stayed at his.

"Is there anything wrong?" Charlie asked.

"No, no. Erm, nothing." Peter felt embarrassed, and couldn't look Charlie in the eye.

"Charlie who was it? Oh, Peter...Is everything alright?" Duffy said, slightly worried her son was waiting for her.

"Yeah, everything's fine Mum. It's just, erm, I was wondering if you were coming to the hospital this afternoon. I tried calling you but you didn't answer your mobile, or the house phone. So thought I'd drop by." Peter said, rising from the sofa.

"Oh, yes, erm, my mobile has been playing up. And I got up late. Mustn't of heard the phone ring. Charlie has just called to take me out for lunch." Duffy quickly spoke, as she corrected herself trying to conceal her embarrassment.

"What time shall I see you there?" Peter asked, as he looked at his Mum slightly awkward.

"Probably around two o'clock? Visiting is between 2-4pm. Is everything ok?" Duffy asked, trying to break the slight tension in the room.

"Yeah, fine, fine. I'll see you then. See you Uncle Charlie." Peter said, as he somewhat hurriedly walked out of the room and let himself out of the flat.

Just as the door slammed shut both Duffy and Charlie turned to look at each other slightly mortified.

"Oh god Charlie, that was just..." Duffy spoke, her voice slightly shaking.

"You don't think he knows we...?" Charlie asked her, guiltily.

"Of course he knows, it was written all over his face Charlie. I've never felt so rotten in my life." Duffy replied, feeling disgusted with herself. As she stood opposite Charlie raising her hand to her head for emphasis.

"Oh come now Duffy, he's an adult." Charlie said, as he walked towards her, trying to comfort her by putting his hands on the tops of her arms.

"Yes, and he has just caught his Mum effectively cheating on his father." Duffy angrily replied, shrugging him off as she walked across the other side of the room.

"I wouldn't call it cheating. Ryan is living in a different country from you. You left him remember. And he's not even his father." Charlie replied, trying to justify their current predicament.

She had walked over to the sofa, and sat with her hands in her lap, looking intently at her fingers, and not at Charlie. Duffy said, as her emotions caught up with her. "And I'm still married to him though Charlie. In the eyes of the law I'm the guilty party. He may not be Peter's father, but he's the only one he's had for the passed fifteen years."

Charlie joined her on the sofa, and grasped her hands in his as he said.

"Oh Duffy, don't do this to yourself. It's not like that and you know it, you said so yourself. Peter is a grown man. He knows you and Ryan aren't happy together. Why do you think he came back to England with you? Ryan maybe the man who has helped raise him, but you are his Mum. Why do you think he gave me your photograph? He is just thinking of you, because he cares."

"Ha, that's not how it felt though Charlie. Peter looked mortified." Duffy sorrowfully answered, still unable to look at him.

"He'll understand Duffy. He just wants to see you happy." Charlie responded, trying to reassure her.

"Ha, I hope so, I really do hope so."

"Come on, let's go and have a drive somewhere, take your mind off it all, yeah?" Charlie replies, taking her in his arms and hugging her close to him.

"Yeah, yeah, ok, you're right." Duffy said, as she hugged into him, sighing to herself.

-x-


	5. Chapter 5

_"You're here now"_

Chapter Five.

Duffy sighed, as Charlie's switched off the car's engine. They'd spent the majority of their journey in relative silence, both trying to avoid the conversation they knew they really needed to discuss. She looked out at the rolling waves, as she knew if she looked at Charlie she would dissolve into tears.

"I don't know what to say Duffy..." Charlie turned to Duffy trying to catch her eye.

"I don't think there is anything you can say. I'm still married Charlie, and I know I need to put an end to it. But, seeing Peter's reaction today, it has gotten to me."

"Do you regret leaving Ryan...?"

"No, of course not."

"Then what?"

"It's not what you think Charlie. I don't love Ryan, I haven't felt anything for him for a long time. I'm even doubting whether it was love, and not just lust and loneliness."

"Duffy, you spent fifteen years on and off with him, and you don't think you loved him?"

"Charlie it's not what you think. When I first met Ryan, I was struggling with the boys, Mum had just died, and well, you and me weren't exactly the best of friends at the time. Ryan came along when I needed someone, and I don't think I realised that those feelings wouldn't last. When we first moved to Auckland the first few years were incredible, and we relished in it all. Then the arguments slowly began, mainly about money and trust. And it sort of built up from there." She sighed again.

"And Mike?" Charlie asked.

"Well, Ryan and I had split up after a few years, then I met Mike at the hospital in Auckland. Things sort of progressed from there. Shortly after Mike was taken into the care facilities in Singapore he ended it with me around a month or so after your visit. As he put it, 'I don't want to be a burden to you, etc, etc."

"And Ryan?"

"The boys wanted to return to Auckland, so we did. It was a few months before I saw Ryan again, by pure chance he showed up to the hospital one day with a sprained arm. We reconciled shortly after that. It was more out of loneliness than anything else, I needed someone and well, he was there."

"Why didn't you come home then?"

"I'd thought about it, but it was the boys that I didn't want to up route halfway across the world again. They'd made Auckland their home, so we stayed."

"So why did you come home?"

"The boys have grown up, they don't really need me anymore. Paul is away at school, so I had no one to come home to. Ryan, he was away with work more than he was home. Every time he was home we argued. I felt trapped, and didn't know what I should do."

"Oh, Duffy..." He said, as she continued.

"Then just a week or so before Christmas I received your card. Somehow you always seem to have the knack for helping me get through my worst moments, even if you were on the other side of the world. You can't imagine how much your words comforted me. I'd missed you so much since Cambodia; but knew you were making a go of it with Maggie. So I'd not known you weren't still with her until then. I'd not heard from you in years."

"I tried to write more, but I didn't know what else to say." He replied.

"Then I knew where I needed to be, here, with you. But it was how I was going to come home that was the difficult part. If it wasn't for Peter I don't know if I'd of had the guts to come back. But he persuaded me, saying if I missed home that much to go and have a break away, by myself. So I did, and lucky I did, because the first chance I got I was on the plane home. The more time I spent here the more I wanted to stay. So I got a working permit and stayed three months. It was in my last week I saw you having your heart attack". She finished, as she looked at him.

"Oh I see." Charlie bowed his head.

"Oh Charlie, don't think that I didn't come back to see you too, I did. I just didn't know how I could just knock on your door and expect you to welcome me with open arms."

"You know I would have, I've always been there for you Duffy, always will be."

"Oh Charlie, if I'd only been stronger I'd have come back years ago. And, well, I doubt we'd be having this conversation sat in your car, in the rain."

"Well I'm glad you are here, with me, no matter what has happened. You're here now." He smiled back at her, then reached for her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"Ha, you're right, as always. But we've missed out on so many years Charlie, and I'm so sorry."

"We can make up for it, don't worry." He replied with a wink.

"Ha, ha, yeah?" She looked up at him hopeful.

"Yeah." He said, as he leaned in to kiss her.

Sitting in a small cafe, they sat drinking cups of tea after they had finished their fish and chips. The chatter of a nearby young couple caught Duffy's attention as she looked over towards them. Charlie, however, was solely focused on Duffy sitting opposite him.

He noticed the way her head tilted slightly, and how her light blonde hair seem to frame her face perfectly. She was so beautiful, he thought to himself: her eyes shone when she was content, and to him it was her most telling feature that revealed her inner most thoughts to him. She smiled to herself, as she looked intently at the couple, completely oblivious of Charlie. He couldn't help but react at her as he let out a small sigh. His feelings for her had never changed, not really, even after all the years they'd been apart. When he saw her smile it still took his breath away, he smiled to himself, and then took a sip of tea.

"I wonder if they realise how content they look together?" Duffy pointed out, staring at the young couple.

"Hmm? Oh, I'd have thought so." Charlie somewhat distractingly replied.

"Remind you of anyone?" Duffy replied, looking back at Charlie.

"Oh, a devilishly handsome charge nurse, and a breathtakingly beautiful staff nurse perhaps?" Charlie smirked back at her, winked, then took another sip of his tea.

"Oh Charlie, why wasn't it that easy for us?" Duffy let out a deep sigh, as it hit her suddenly that they could have had a very different life together.

"We had our own moments Duffy, but we always had our friendship, don't forget that." Charlie reassuringly answered her, knowing full well that she regretted their time apart as much as he did.

"I know, I know, if we could only go back and start again, things would've been very different for us both. Another life..."

"We will always have regrets Duffy. But now is our chance."

"You're such an optimist Charlie Fairhead."

"Nothing wrong with that." Charlie said as he smirked at her.

"Oh, no, nothing wrong with that at all." Duffy replied, as she smiled back at him, as her eyes shone. His heart melted one more.

Strolling along the promenade, arm in arm, they seemed far more at ease with each other than they had been earlier.

"Ha, ha." Duffy suddenly giggled.

"What?" Charlie turned to her.

"Nothing." Duffy bit her lip, and shook her head.

"It can't be nothing." His brows furrowed in response.

"Oh, it's just something you said earlier." She chuckled.

"What was?"

"How you still felt eighteen inside." She bit her lip once again and giggled.

"Oh, that, yes, well..." Charlie suddenly blushed, lost for words.

"Heat of the moment?" She suggested, giggling again.

"Not exactly..." Charlie replied, swallowing, his nerves getting the better of him.

"Oh?" Duffy stopped, released his arm, and turned to look at him.

"You, erm..you sort of...have that effect on me." Charlie replied shyly back at her.

"Oh, do I, really?" Duffy grinned back at him, blushing.

Charlie sighed, looking at her smiling back at him. He grinned back at her, as he brushed her hair behind her ears and said, "Duffy...just seeing you smile...takes my breath away."

Duffy was so overwhelmed by his response, she hardly had time to think of a reply. So she raised her hand to touch his cheek, smiled, as she said; "Oh Charlie."

Charlie sighed, as she leaned in and kissed him.

-x-


	6. Chapter 6

_"Just one kiss has changed everything"_

Chapter Six _._

Charlie looked down at his phone waiting for her call, but the screen was blank, no calls, no messages, the time read: 20:33pm, he sighed to himself.

He had thought about nothing else all day, each time he glanced at her, "how could I not tell you for so long?"

He had wanted to tell her, fought with himself numerous times over the years to do just that, but he never had. He wasn't worthy of her, he wasn't good enough for her. He had many years to regret it. There were a handful of times he had come close to telling her. Just before she left with Ryan, being one of them.

 _"I want you to be happy for me." She'd said._

 _"I don't think I can do that Duffy...I don't want you to go, it's too late, you've gone already." He'd said._

 _"I do love you Charlie Fairhead, thank you for everything." Were her last words to him._

Kissing her goodbye and watching her leave was the hardest thing he'd ever done.

Who'd have thought that the next time he'd come close to telling her would be when he was being chastised by her in the middle of a marketplace in Cambodia. But again he lost his nerve, another wrong time, she was with Mike, and as she put it, _"the happiest she had ever been"_ , and that fact tortured him.

But he let her hate him for his meddling and trying to uncover the truth about Mike. After Mike's stroke and their stay at the clinic they parted ways on somewhat friendlier terms, but it was clear even then that he was still in love with her. Just seeing her with Mike unsettled him, but did she know? As she aptly put at the time, _"you're stuck and you hate it"._

How true those words were for him. He was stuck, stuck for years being in love with his best friend, who he hadn't enough courage to tell how truly he felt for fear of rejection, and of losing their friendship. Thirty years he had known her. During that time he had been there for some of the most important things in her life. He helped her learn how to drive, sat with her when she battled with the aftermath of her rape ordeal. When she lost her boyfriend Peter, he took her to his grave and reassured her things would get better. He was lucky enough to give her away when she eventually got married to Andrew, and was also there for her when he cheated on her, when she cheated on him, and late when he tragically died. He had even help deliver her youngest son into the world. But when she lost her Mum she blamed him, he tried to be there for her but she pushed him away, and into the arms of Ryan, her current husband. But hadn't he been there for her throughout those tough times, as she had been there for him. Thirty years of friendship. And those years have got to mean something, surely?

 _"What about Ryan? Fifteen years together?" She'd said._

 _"What about thirty years together?" He'd replied._

And those years have meant something. Who'd have thought that the introduction of an A & E night-shift team at Holby City Hospital thirty years ago, would create a lasting friendship like theirs? She meant the world to him, and always had done. But had she really felt the same, after all those years together?

There was something about the way she looked at him when they were about to kiss earlier that day in the store cupboard. Like she was that young nurse again looking into the eyes of her older boss she had a crush on. A moment she had always dreamt of, and now was truly happening, all whilst they hid in a store cupboard and she had vomit in her hair. Not the most romantic of liaisons, not as they had expected it, but a moment that neither could fight any longer, nor chose to ignore.

Charlie sighed to himself once more, has she really felt the same all these years? Thinking about the photograph and Peter's words to him, "whenever Mum was upset, sad, or tired she'd look at this, she just didn't know I knew what she was looking at."

If it wasn't for Peter he might not have had the courage to speak out. She is married, they are now grandparents, she has a family, more importantly that family includes Ryan. And now she has chosen to be with him rather than her husband? Has it just taken a simple conversation and a kiss to finally be together?

His phone buzzed as the text message read:

Duffy -

I'm so sorry it's late, Peter has just left. Can I come round? I need to see you. D x

He smiled, as he typed his response.

Charlie -

Of course. Don't worry about the time. See you soon. C x

-x- END -x-


End file.
